Why childhood burnout is real and why it’s not going to change without a significant shift in mindset, habits and behaviours

- It all begins with Energy Management and It's Not just for the grown ups

If we thought that burnout was only problematic for the adults out there, we were sorely mistaken. A growing body of research tells us the inevitable truth that burnout is affecting our children, and some more than others.  

There is surely nothing more worrisome than the thought out our precious angels hurting for any reason and despite our best efforts to shield them from the stress of our modern world, we find ourselves powerless to its eternal pull of mental, emotional, social, physical and emotional demands.

Just as adult burnout isn't solely found in the workplace, kid burnout isn't happening only at school either.

 How the experts define Burnout on Children:

According to ‘understood.org' states that

“Burnout in children happens when kids are faced with ongoing stress or frustration with no chance to relax and recharge.

Of course, some stress is necessary for kids to achieve. It can motivate them to set goals and then reach them. The problem comes when the work and the stress are nonstop.

At first, kids may continue to do well at the things they’ve been trying to do. But then they may not rest long enough to feel a sense of accomplishment. And they may not have enough time to recharge by the time they take on their next challenge.

Eventually, that takes a toll. The stress they feel can turn to anxiety. The exhaustion can affect how well they perform certain tasks. And their motivation and interest level may drop.” (www.understood.org)

The signs of burnout to watch out for in our kids:

The 6 SIGNS of burnout according to learningliftoff.com are:

1. Grades get worse

2. Reduced engagement with friends or family

3. Falling asleep in class or in early evening at home

4. Being late to class or school

5. Increasingly reporting physical ailments

6. Dropping out of extra-curricular activities

So most importantly, what are the KEY DRIVERS of childhood burnout?

1.The constant pressure to optimize their futures . Kids today have to constantly consider the perils of work and career with enough specificity to worry about it. At the same time that they stress about the future that’s so very far off, they live with technology that keeps that anxiety consistently in the front of their minds. (vox.com)

2. Parents who live vicariously through the success of their children

3. Burnt out parents whose low energy , stress and upset has a direct bearing on their children

4. School pressure and curriculum stress - increased workload and duration of workload.

4. Not enough recovery and playtime - There is a growing body of research that shows a link between play and the development of cognitive and social skills that are prerequisites for learning more complex concepts as children get older. For example, play is linked to growth in memory, self-regulation, oral language, and recognizing symbols. It has been linked to higher levels of school adjustment and increased social development. Play has also been linked to increased literacy skills and other areas of academic learning (a view held by Piagetian and Vygotskian theories of child development). Scholastic.com

So are all children at risk of burnout?

Whilst all children can run the risk of burnout in the right environment and with the right pressures, it is acknowledged that children who are most at risk, seem to fall into two categories:

1) Those who are either underperforming  

2) And Those who are over-performing

Children who are seen as gifted or ahead of the pack might be targeted by educators as needing to be ‘stretched’ to perform at a higher level, which can ultimately lead to overtraining of the brain and cause exhaustion and mental and emotional fatigue.

On the flip side, yet with the same net result, ‘Kids who learn and think differently may have to work harder or longer than their peers to finish the same assignment.’ (understood.org) they might be pushed to take extra classes, to extended their day further with more and more learning, in an attempt to keep up with their peers leading to the same net result - over training of the brain.

So how do we deal with burnout in children?

Well we deal with childhood burnout in much the same way as we deal with it in adults and in fact a combination of the parent and the child learning these steps in conjunction can be incredibly powerful. It’s actually the same principles, just wrapped in a different coloured bow and in a way that a child understands. In fact, sometimes kids understand this stuff much more quickly than we do simply because the length of time on this earth to create stories, judgements and perceptions of self and others, is just shorter.

This is good news for parents who get on top of both their own and their children’s recovery, quickly and thoroughly.  

At Energyhealthinc we work with working parents and families to understand the deep seated drivers of burnout to help create a longer term holistic and sustainable Energy Recovery Mindset Plan, to prevent children of future generations falling foul to burnout, at work, school home or play . 

A few of the strategies we use are:

1) Creating an ongoing discussion around recovery in the home - encouraging each other - parents and children alike, to take regular breaks each hour and respecting when one or the other needs a recovery break.

2) Communication of feelings, thoughts, concerns and ideas around stress and upset.  Tuning into when someone's energy is low.

3) Helping and supporting other members of the family by reminding them to take a break or rest.

4) Have an accountability board with good energy habits around food, sleep and movement energy that everyone can see and understand.  

5) A system of strategies that both the parents and kids can use when they are feeling flat or tired.  Pay attention to when the kids have a longer day and where they might need extra recovery, then match that stress with the right recovery E.g. physical stress with physical recovery, mental stress with mental recovery etc.

6) Avoid buying into the culture of hard work (work or school) as a badge of honour. More is most certainly not always better.  Other families might be less likely to recover with their kids and the perception of recovery can be misinterpreted as 'lazy'.  Though it is challenging, when you adopt a recovery mindset as a family, you look after yourselves and each other, paying close attention to your own families energy levels, not concerning yourselves with others and how they might be perceiving you.